Delta Airlines: Climb Towards Sucking More, or Sucking Less?

Delta’s tagline is “Keep Climbing.” Is this because when you’re at the bottom, you have nowhere to go but up? What are they climbing towards? Do they want to suck more, or less? I must admit I was hoping for less but now I’m not sure.

I was super late to a combined birthday party that I had been looking forward to for weeks due to Delta’s systemic, organized ineptitude, indifference or incompetence. I don’t know which of the three was more prevalent.

It could be that the gods simply didn’t want me at the party on time, so, maybe it was for the good. At any rate this is my review of Delta’s performance yesterday. I fly enough that I know it “should” be an anomaly, but one can only hope.

On time departure? Fail.

It looks like Delta’s record here is actually pretty good, and I would suggest that it is. Yesterday was an anomaly.

DAL Ontime Performance Ratings

Prompt, professional communication from the flight crew in the event of a service disruption or anomaly? Fail.

I can’t stand it when pilots try to downplay issues with humor or subtly throwing others under the bus. I don’t want a pilot’s opinion, I want to know when the problem is going to be fixed.

The other pet peeve I have is the chatty flight crew. Don’t tell me I’m flying over (x) or exactly what you’re serving onboard. We all know coke is free, stale pretzels and peanuts are available and booze requires a credit card. Just start the service and let us fly in peace.

Prompt, reliable assistance to the flight crew from the ground crew? Fail.

Delta’s ground crews are horrible. It sucks when a good flight that is otherwise uneventful ends with a 20-30 minute wait for a jetway or gate. This happens all the time. I think they need new jobs…at the snack bar.

Take off successfully from departure airport? Pass.

Professional, courteous service from the flight crew? Fail.

I know this is going to happen. Its only a matter of time. Instead of saying I’ve had enough and blowing the escape slide (greatest thing ever) an attendant is going to go ballistic on a passenger. Why not? If we go ballistic on an attendant we’re tasered by an air marshal and I don’t have any problem with that. They go ballistic on us I’m pretty sure how that one will end up.

Provide in flight equipment e.g. seats that are in good working order and in-flight services e.g. internet that were listed as available at the time of booking? Fail.

The crooked seat back that made typing on a laptop impossible was an insult. No internet for 5.5 hours after sitting for an hour and a half after door closure….was…..horribly…..frustrating.

In flight entertainment: Duct tape free in first and business class.

The photo was robbed from another site and its from a United flight…At least they could use their laptops.

Provide medical assistance or similar to passengers in need, as possible for the duration of the flight? Fail.

The flight attendant was complaining to another about a passenger in the back that had a panic attack and needed oxygen. The comment was give the passenger two shots of bourbon and tell them to be quiet.

I have zero problem with that policy! I suspect my anxiety will now begin to increase 2-3 times per flight, roughly coinciding with my level of thirst moving forward.

Land successfully at arrival airport? Pass.


On time arrival? Fail.

I made it to the party…it was a great time. New Orleans style Hand Grenades and good company have a way of curing most ills.

In the event of a service disruption or similar promptly respond to all customer service questions or complaints? Fail.

Im used to surly attendants (their job sucks) delays and inconvenience (airports are busy) or things not working as they should. Oh well. I can’t stand being ignored in the face of clear mistakes, however. @DeltaAssist simply deleting my tweet and ignoring me? That’s a class act. Thanks Delta!

Delta Airlines: Customer Service Mission Statement


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